Dramatic Differences: The Loss of Hope
by Dufferooni
Summary: Filler between DD1&DD2. Zoro and Luffy have been seperated, and now they're starting to realise just how much the other means to them. With Luffy in Garp's clutches and Zoro struggling without him, will they survive long enough to see each other again?ZxL
1. The First Days

**Clarobell: Hey guys, this is the first chapter of a small series of **_**short**_** chapters, filling in a few details concerning the gap between DD1 and DD2. I hope this clears up a few issues and answers a few questions when the time comes to read DD2. These aren't exceptionally long, around 1500 words each. We're only using them to explain some things and tide you over until DD2 is read. Enjoy!**

**Plushie: Enjoy the filler everyone! D**

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Dramatic Differences

**The Loss of Hope – Luffy**

**The First Days**

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Did I do something wrong?

It's cold, and, I'm hungry…

Where did Sanji and Nami go? Zoro? Why am I back here? It's so dirty…

I didn't really mind it before. I used to smell like that too, didn't I? But, it looks so dirty now. I don't want to clean up this mess. Oh no! He's coming! Maybe if I lie really still…

He went out. Maybe to get some beer? I don't want to be here when he's drunk! He'll hurt me! He always hurt me…

I like living with Sanji and Nami – did I do something really bad? Is that why they sent me back? I don't want to be back here! I want to go home. My home is with Zoro. Stupid cat, go away! You made this place all dirty and now I have to clean it up!

…I'm sorry, come back. Good kitty, you're still nice and clean. You're skinny, has he been feeding you? I guess not… He put bars on the windows… I wonder when he did that? They're so cold and strong, I can't get out the window with them there…

The door's locked with a new lock too! Wait, why is everything packed up? All his clothes and stuff. Is he going somewhere? He's back!!

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It hurts. I remember this pain. Don't cry, don't show it. I remember the rules now. He hurt me for asking questions, but, I like asking questions. It's how you learn things, Nami said. That's why I was so stupid before, because I was never _allowed_ to ask questions. I want to go home. I want to ask Nami what I did that was really wrong that I got sent here to be punished…

Maybe it was the Alvida lady? She told me not to tell anybody about what happened in that place, but I did. Nami and Sanji said it was okay though! I hope Zoro's okay… I miss him so much… why did he let them send me back here?? He promised… he promised he'd protect me from Gramps.

I want Zoro.

He asked what I said. Should I tell him…? Ow! I guess I better…

Zoro's not coming? Why? OW! ...I forgot I wasn't supposed to ask questions. But, then, how am I supposed to get answers? My head hurts… too many questions… so tired… ow!! Why did he hit me for yawning?? He never used to hit me for yawning! Oh no… I said that out loud… he looks _really _mad now!

T-there's no way out… the windows are barred – and the door is locked! The walls behind me… no way out… help me Zoro, please…

Everything's so dizzy. He said… he said… what did he say? I don't remember… something about keeping me quiet. I can't see. He put something around my eyes. The cats are crying… they're scared. Why are they scared…?

No! NO! DON'T KILL THEM!! THEY DIDN'T DO ANYTHING WRONG!! I WONT SHUT UP! I WONT!! STOP HURTING THEM!! STO—

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I don't remember anything after he hit me. I just know we're somewhere different. It smells bad. I want to go home. I want my Sanji and Nami… I want my Zoro… I want to meet the little baby…

I'll be good… please… I'll be so good. Please, don't leave me here. Don't leave me with Gramps again…

Zoro…

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Clarobell: Well, there's the first chapter, I hope you like it! I know, Iknow, it's really short, but it's better than nothing, eh??

**Plushie: Can I eat you? 3**


	2. Diary Entries 14

**Plushie: Hey everyone. This is looking from Zoro's side of what happened. Hopefully it'll explain a little more of how he's feeling directly. What you guys also have to recall is, Zoro **_**is **_**dyslexic. Ie; he has trouble with the literary side of things, ne? If you say what he's saying aloud, it makes better sense. **

**Clarobell: All spelling errors are totally intentional here, and remember as well, Zoro loves numbers, so substituting numbers makes things easier for him. Thanks to all who reviewed the last chapter!**

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Dramatic Differences

**The Loss of Hope – Zoro**

**Journal Entries 1-4**

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Wat hapehnd 2 you Luffy? Deed he come bak 2 get u? He had 2 hav.

Im so pissd off abowt wat hapehnd. Iv bean loking 4 u.

Nami told mi 2 rite a jernal 2 get mai frus ferustashion owt. I dohnt like riting but I dohnt want 2 tallk 2 theem ehneemore.

Its mai fowlt this hapehnd. Im sow sorree Luffy. I cahnt rite ehneemore. I hate this.

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Ive desided 2 giv this jernal thing anuhther go. Im still looking 4 u Luffy. I wownt giv uhp. I reellee miss u but I cahnt find u!

Sanji keeps bugging mi abowt tallking and Nami ees gowing to hav the bay bai **babee** sewn. Luffy theyve made mi stop looking 4 u. I didnt wahnt 2 but Sanji war warn warned mi that Nami culd lews the babee agan.

Its noht fair! I no they wahnt this babee but wat abowt u? maybee I can sneek owt lay lai l8er ne?

Ive been staing at Usopps a lot laytlee. At the cercus, with Chopper. He likes 2 keep me companee at nite. And hes lyke a jiant teddee. But not as guhd 2 hug as u r Luffy. I relee want 2 hug u again. I want a spesh speshal hug lyke u used 2 give me. I want u 2 b bak here again, I miss u so much. I cant rite aneemore, my hands r shayking. Ill sneek owt and look sum more, I promise.

I **will**find u.

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Luffy,

Im goeeng 2 right this jernal thing 2 u. Maybe u culd read it wen I find u again. But I dont reelly want u 2. I dont want u 2 b sad. I stayd owt all nite last nite and didnt go 2 Usopp's becuse I got lost again and now im … grownded?

I dont no wat that meens but they sed I cant leeve the howse n e more unless they r with me and they were reelly angree. I dont no wat to do now Luffy. They r beeing mean with this and I no they want this babee and I no its not far away but I dont want you 2 b ree replay replaysd. I dont want u 2 b 4got10. Yor my best frend.

And now ive lost u 2. Just lyke be4. Lyke I deed with... sum1 else. I have 2 go now Luffy. I still miss u that won't change. But Sanji is yelling that if I dont come and eet, hes goeeng 2 use me 4 soccer practice. I cant sneak out 2nite, or nemore. Theyve made me swear and I cant break promises. … But I broke mine 2 u.

Im so sorry.

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Namis getteeng bigger and wee-erder. And Sanji went back 2 work 2day. Im supposd 2 b studeeing, but Namis asleep and I dont want 2 reed n e thing rite now. Yesterday they left me with Usopp and Chopper while they went 2 c the dok doktor doctor 4 a chekup on Namis baby. Its coming sewn and they r mayking shure theres no more complea compli complee compleekayshons.

Chopper hasnt left me alone wenever they come ova and Usopps allways trieeng 2 make me smile or talk.

But not lyke Nami and Sanji he doesant push me 2. If I dont want 2 then he finds sumthing else 2 do. I lyke spending time with them but the otha day Usopp fownd the tape of me and u wen we played that time. As nakamaman and the marimo. Do u remember that? It was fun ne?

Luffy were r u? I meess u so much. Sumthings happening. Namis panting reelly hard. I have 2 go. Luffy I miss u so much and I promeese that they wont replase u with this new baby.

I need u.

Luffy.

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Plushie: And there you have it people. Understand all that? Fantastic! It was incredibly hard to write.

**Clarobell: I can imagine, poor Plushie, having to DUHHH her brain to write like this. Anyway, thank again to all who reviewed. DD2 should be out in a few more weeks, we're just trying to get the first few chapters sorted so we can give regular updates.**


	3. New Place, New Rules, New Friends

Clarobell:

**Clarobell: And here's chapter 2. Poor lil Luffy, eh? Sorry for the lateness, we're struggling a little.**

**Plushie: Enjoy. :3**

**Dramatic Differences**

**The Loss of Hope – Luffy**

**New Place, New Rules, New Friends**

Grandpa's new place is dirty, and small; smaller than the old flat. I don't like it at all. The toilet doesn't work, so Gramps makes me clean it with my hands. He won't let me have a shower any more, not even a cold one, and he said I can't have any new clothes either. I love the pyjamas Nami and Sanji bought me, with all the fluffy sheepies, but Gramps house is much colder than theirs, and they're so thin!

I wish I had my sandals, because Gramps breaks a lot of bottles around the house, and I keep cutting up my feet when cleaning. He said if I want a drink, then I should have a drink from one of the bottles, but I didn't like that stuff at all.

I was pretty bored, and couldn't sleep, so when Gramps was watching TV, I picked up one of his bottles to see if I could read any of the words. I was so happy when I could! Only the smaller ones, but Gramps got so mad! Is reading not allowed here, either??

_Beer?? How the __**fuck**__ do you know that bottle said that, huh?? Those fucking scumbags teach you that?? You think you're better now because you can read a fucking word?! I'll show you fucking beer!_

The drink wasn't nice at all, but Gramps made me drink more and more. I just woke up, and I don't feel so good. Gramps it gone again, and the house is quiet… the cats are all gone now. Did Gramps kill them all? I wish I was in my bed with Zoro. He'd make me feel better…

My throat stings and my stomach is all twisty and sore. I'm glad Gramps isn't here to tell me off, because my head's hurting lots. I don't remember going to sleep last night…? I… don't remember much at all. What happened? Nn, I feel sick…

Gramps was so mad when he came home. I got sick all over the floor and then I don't know what happened, but he woke me up by kicking me. How long is this punishment, Grandpa? How long until I can go home?

But… Gramps, home is with Sanji and Nami and Zoro…

I can't go back? But, why? Ow! But, Gramps! OW! I-I'm sorry, I won't ask any more questions…

Gramps has some friends round, and they're all smoking cigarettes and drinking the beer thing. I cleaned up, like Gramps told me to. I don't like the smells, they make my head hurt. They don't smell like Sanji's cigarettes. I've never seen these people before, but I don't like them very much. The woman keeps glaring at me, and reminds me of the Alvida lady, and the two guys keep saying bad things with Gramps about my family.

Grandpa, Sanji and Nami were good to me! They taught me lots of stuff and—AH! I-I'm sorry… I'll be good, please don't throw anything else…

I want to go home…

Sanji… Nami…

Please, I'll be good…

I want to go home…

Zoro…

**Clarobell: Don't forget to review! I know this one was really short, but they're kind of just drabbles, filling in some gaps for DD2. I'll try to update again soon.**

**Plushie: Thanks for the review last chapter.**


	4. Drunk

Clarobell:

**Clarobell: Apologies for the late update. Well, warning here, this gets pretty nasty. Not description-wise, but the insinuations that are made. It's quite… subtle, I guess, so I think it would be safe to keep this as a T for now. I'm so gonna get killed for this chapter. prepares shield and sword Well, bring it on.**

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**Dramatic Differences**

**The Loss of Hope – Luffy**

**Drunk**

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I don't like my pyjamas any more, but, I think the pyjamas don't like me even more than I don't like them. One of Grandpa's friend's beat me up because I didn't cook his food right and now all the sheepies are red and brown, instead of white. They don't feel fluffy any more like they used to, either. They're all… hard, and sticky.

My face feels sticky and sore… Gramps said that his friend had a lot of fun when I fell asleep. They made me drink the weird stuff in the bottles they bring and I don't even remember falling asleep – it was just like with that beer thing! My head feels fuzzy, but Gramps is in a happy mood today because of it, so, that's good… right? He said that his friends all had fun while I was asleep by tipping the bottles of drink on me to see if I'd wake up. I guess I didn't, because I can't remember, but Gramps said I did…

… I'm so confused.

Gramps hasn't called me to clean up yet. I think he still thinks I'm asleep. My head hurts too much when I open my eyes. Maybe… just a few more minutes sleep…?

Ow! Gramps! Ow! That hurts! What? Drunk? Me? But, that's what _you_ do, Gramps! Ow!! I-I didn't _mean_ to! Honest! They _made_ me drink it! OW!

…Gramps said I was drunk. I remember… when I met Nami the first time, she was drunk too, I think. I don't really remember it well though. Why would Nami and Sanji go to the pub where they get drunk?? Drunk makes your head hurt! It makes you sick… I can't even remember _getting_ drunk…

Oh no… Gramps friends are here again. I don't want to play, or drink. I just want to go home and sleep. Please Gramps, can I go home?? Ow!

… sorry Gramps.

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I think I fell asleep. Somebody's trying to wake me up, but I'm so sleepy. They're not kicking me like Gramps does… they're… touching me. No… I don't like it… no, it isn't nice, stop it! Ow! What are you doing?? Gramps! Help! Please! They're your friends, what are they doing?! Please, Gramps! Please! Help me!!

What?? What do you mean 'boy-love'? What's that?? Ow! I don't understand! Why do I have to be punished?? What? Of course I love Zoro! **OW! **But, why can't I love him?? He's my best friend!

…more than that? What do you mean? I… I don't understand… no! I don't Gramps, honest!

Oi! No! Stop it!! Don't take them away! My pyjamas! That's all I have left from Zoro! Please! Why are you…?! What are you…?!

Zoro… Please…

Zoro…

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Clarobell: Poooooor Luffy. readies shield and sword again


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